90 Things Women Wish Men Would Stop Doing To Make Their Lives Easier And Safer

Women's fight for equal rights has achieved great success, but it's still far from over. Globally, women still have only 3/4 of the rights that men have. And while some countries are focusing on implementing new reforms, others seem to be set on reducing women's bodily autonomy. One thing is clear: being born a woman puts you at a disadvantage.

While some women experience it less than others, it's still a devastating reality. And clueless or ignorant men don't help. One Reddit user wanted to learn what women wish men would stop doing, and people were eager to share advice on how men can be better.

Almost 5k replies later, Bored Panda selected the best answers on men's behavior that bothers women the most. From enormous egos to bad communication, scroll down to upvote the answers that resonate with you the most, and feel free to share any advice that we missed!

#1

If a woman tells you she's a lesbian when you're flirting, it means one of two things:

- 1: She is a lesbian.

- 2: She is pretending to be a lesbian so you'll stop flirting with her.

Either way, you should stop flirting.

Image credits: BW_Bird

#2

Confuse politeness or kindness with flirting

Image credits: Commercial_Compote35

#3

being mean to girls they find unattractive

Image credits: webbrlx

#4

Thinking their wives are live-in maids. It’s not your wife’s responsibility to replace your crusty socks, underwear, or make you a doctor’s appointment unless you’re actually ill or otherwise impaired.

Like, does my partner have to deal with my menstrual cup? N o. Never.

Image credits: ktamine

#5

When you need to get past me, please don't put your hands on my waist/hips/lower back to move me aside. I don't know you. Stop touching me.

Image credits: teddybearer78

#6

Not calling out other "bros" for misogynistic behavior.

Image credits: anon

#7

No is a complete sentence.

Sorry, I bored at work, so this was a bit short. What I meant is, if you are in a relationship with a guy, no would be a short, perhaps cold answer, but I don't think that's what OP meant.

I meant it as, if a guy bothers you for any reason, like he wants your phone number or any socials you don't want to give him, you don't need to provide a reason, because a simple no should be enough. Unfortunately, a lot of men (yes I know, not all) won't take just a no for an answer an *must* know the reason, because whatever.

So, to answer the original question: I wish some guys would just accept a simple no and would stop asking again and again and again for something that has already been answered with a no.

Image credits: HellKaiserFox

#8

blaming women because they don't want to sleep with you

ever heard of a self fulfilling prophecy? Why would any woman want to be around someone who thinks like that?

Image credits: NoLack5170

#9

Stop putting more effort into shouting " Not all men" then you do in making sure your friends aren't being creeps.

Image credits: BriRoxas

#10

Weaponized incompetence.

Image credits: Kaitzilla

#11

Please stop treating us like appliances. We aren’t your cheap labor, your free therapist, your perfect breeding animal, your expert chef and your twenty four seven child care. We are not replaceable or inferior or substitute for a punching bag.

We are people. And you can stop excusing your behavior as traditional or biological or anatomical. You do know better.

Image credits: Specialist-Lion-8135

#12

Please. God.
Some men don't wash their a**es when they shower. Because it feels "gay"
Stop worrying so much about being a macho manly man. Being secure in your manhood is way hotter.
Go wash your a*s.

Image credits: Alternative-Tell5541

#13

Dismissing our safety concerns and trying to gaslight us out of taking basic precautions.

Image credits: Raaqu

#14

Please stop sending d**k pics to random women online. It's just straight up creepy and gross. If a woman wants to see your d**k, she'll ask for a picture.

Image credits: FUCK_INDUSTRIAL

#15

Following women when they’re walking. I’ve been followed by cars, followed by men yelling at me, had dead silent men follow me to work and then stand outside, follow my friends to a bar we’re walking to, etc. It isn’t all men, sure. But most women have been followed. I don’t know why they do it, to feel powerful I guess? To instill fear that they know where I work or what bus I take?

Edit: every dude in my replies arguing about how they sometimes are behind a woman and what are they supposed to do, just know that if you’re not being creepy it isn’t an issue. That’s not what I’m talking about. In this context followed vs walked behind are 2 VERY different things. If you’re simply walking behind a woman who appears freaked out it’s probably because she has been antagonistically followed or verbally or even physically harassed/threatened/harmed. As long as you aren’t being creepy, you’re good.

If you’re worried that you appear like you’re following her, my advice would be to call someone and chat (like a couple people recommended in my replies), this makes it so it’s obvious she isn’t a target of yours or even on your mind, you’re busy going about your life. OR either slow down or speed up and pass her. Don’t match her pace so that she sees you keeping stride in the corner of her eye, that’s so scary. And lastly, have some sympathy. Women don’t act afraid with the intention of insulting you, they act afraid out of protection of themselves.

Image credits: waffleironone

#16

A good rule of thumb is if you wouldn't touch a man that way to get past them, don't touch a woman that way.

Image credits: poisonselina

#17

I wish men would stop needing to be told to do something around the house. They have eyes, most of them can clearly see that the trash is overflowing or that they left their dishes out. Pick up after yourself. Learn how to feed yourself and dress yourself. Stop waiting on your SO to be your mommy. Being a man is not an excuse for you to not be able to take care of yourself like a grown up.

Image credits: saltyeleven

#18

believing women are a monolith and just because this one woman liked something, all women will. Goes for sex, friendships, work relationships, anything

#19

Unsolicited advice. Don't tell me to smile, I'm not here for your amusement. Don't tell me I'd look nicer if I let my hair down, it's up for a reason. Don't approach me with some comment about my appearance, I promise I'll make you feel 2 cm tall when I'm done with you. I don't want your comments about me, I'm perfectly happy with myself.

#20

Leaving pee on the toilet seat or floor and not wiping it up

#21

Communicating to us through our husbands/ boyfriends/ fathers etc.

I was doing 3D modelling work for a guy in Italy a few years back and when he needed something done he’d tell my husband what he wanted done and tell my husband to tell me.

It was so frustrating and belittling. My husband was working on something else for him that had nothing to do with my project. Yet every damn time he wanted something done he’d tell my husband, not me.

Ever since then I’ve refused to work on the same project my husband is working on.

#22

Coming on our forums and arguing/harassing us

#23

Being thirsty and assuming every woman on the net is looking for some...

#24

Stop believing that men are superior than women.

#25

Engaging in toxic masculinity. Fellas, you're beautiful people worthy of support, kindness, and love. It's healthy to have emotions. ALL emotions. To feel scared, sad, insecure, etc. Support one another. This goes for all genders. Life is hard. Let's be excellent to one another.

#26

Playing the "what about men" game when someone is talking about a women's specific issue. If you care about a men's issue that's amazing! I love it, I'm here for it. Don't hijack a conversation about women to talk about it. Start a different thread, cause, conversation, etc.

#27

Touching me without consent.

#28

Acting like a genuine friend only to try and have sex with you.

#29

Monologuing when you're supposed to be having a conversation. I've talked to so many dudes who will just talk about themselves for two hours straight and not even let me get a word in edgewise. Believe it or not, women have thoughts and opinions too. We're not here to just listen and nod and agree with everything you say. Ask us for our thoughts. Be curious about our minds. Just ask us a f*****g question. It's not that hard. We're people too. Listen and you might actually learn something.

#30

Don’t put others down to raise me up. Had an ex gf who actually did this, saying how I’m “smarter than most girls” or “really good at this for a chick” or even berating a waitress and saying “you would never dress like that for attention”. You can compliment me without putting others down! I don’t say “you’re nice for a boy” so don’t say I’m something or other for a girl!

#31

Continuing to do a thing a person has asked you to stop doing as a joke.

Like there's this thing that dudes often seem to think is cute and funny, where like, in a movie, the funloving man and the stick-in-the-mud lawyer lady are taking a painting class, and it's his solemn duty to teach her to *loosen up and live a little.* So he dabs a bit of paint on her nose, and she goes "OMG STAHP" and he does it again and now they're rolling around covered in paint making out while romantic music plays.

But in real life, he is drunk, has sat on her chair and broken it, and instead of apologizing is now laughing and leaping around her kitchen swinging a chair leg over his head, hooting and hollering while she powerlessly begs him to stop before he breaks any more of her belongings.

I don't think men realize how terrifying it is when you're a woman asking a man to stop something and he doesn't. Even a harmless joke. It makes you realize, holy s**t, I can not shout loud enough for him to hear how serious I am, I can not physically stop him from doing whatever he wants to do to me, he can do whatever he wants and there is nothing I could do short of causing grievous bodily harm to stop him.

Always. Every single time. If someone asks you to stop something, even if they're laughing, stop immediately, even if you just stop long enough to explain why it's important to you to keep doing it. Always stop immediately.

#32

Assuming we want children.

#33

Start off with energy they can’t keep up. I had a guy who did little things for me like if the air in my tires was low he’d go and fill them without my even asking. This is something I can do myself, but it was such a kind and thoughtful thing to do. Similarly, he refilled my wiper fluid after I mentioned it was out (bug splatter everywhere). We’d pick up croissants on Sunday and he said it was “one of our things” and he’d say, “Have you ever done this?” then when I said no he’d say okay we’ll do this on a good weather weekend, etc. Just little stuff that made my life easier and made me feel like he was someone I could count on, etc., but inevitably he stops doing these things and I’m left knowing *something* is missing, but I can’t put my finger on it or if I bring it up, I’m told I’m being demanding or needy and suddenly I’m putting too much pressure on him. Like no, babe, I was just wondering if you still wanted to go up to the lake you’ve been hyping up so we could go jet skiing like *you* suggested.

The first time this happened to me it was such a mindf**k lol.

#34

(Obviously this only applies to specific people), I wish they'd stop speaking on behalf of women when it comes to things like how women feel on issues (what they find attractive, how they think) and their bodies (making comments that sound like a medieval medical diagnosis about women), that they really have no evidence for. Also wish they'd stop trying to revert the world to both 1950s and 1800s Western society so they can have subservient underage brain empty wives. Manosphere and sexist nonsense. I'm tired of it. It's draining.

#35

catcalling. what's the purpose? i don't want to have sex with you just because you screamed "nice tits" at me from your car

#36

Cut and file your God damn fingernails before they get close to my lady bits. If you don't, don't stop and complain and look confused when you fingers are f*****g bloody.

#37

Harassing wemon online games or VR, I get harassed way to much and it's getting to a point were I just don't go online any more be nice and I will like you more?? Stop feeling wemon up in VR stop stalking wemon I have had all this happen to me I'm sick of it I hope someone agrees

#38

Making choices about women’s rights and women’s bodies when they have no f*****g clue what we as women go through and experience.

#39

Please do not try to flirt with us when we’re sitting in a coffee shop reading a book with headphones on. This has happened to me and other friends multiple times over the years. The headphones are to keep you away.

#40

1. The disgusting s**t that’s said about women in the boys’ group chat
2. Exchanging pictures (screenshots or non consensual nudes) of women you aim to “conquer” in the group chats
3. The entire culture of “south east Asia trip with the boys where we talk about and treat chicks like walking vaginas and egg each other on to cheat on our missus”
4. Laughing at the one mate who’s a f*****g pig rather than calling them out
5. Stop getting defensive when you’re called out for speaking or behaving in a way that’s hurtful or upsetting — no one is telling you that you can’t be angry or upset, but you do need to actually learn how to express your emotions in a respectful and clear manner, especially your anger

#41

Commenting on the fact that I'm a woman while I'm working. I don't really care if you haven't met a "woman cabinet refinisher" before, just let me do my job and stay out of my way

#42

Just because a woman is not smiling, it is not your job to change that.

Image credits: Idol_Luna

#43

harming or threatening harm to women who reject them

Image credits: prezzyofthedgc

#44

Following women when they’re walking. This is the most annoying and fear-inducing action that I have ever experienced. I have been out walking through my neighborhood, walking around the block on my lunch break, etc., and on multiple occasions, men have passed me in their cars and turned the vehicle around to ask me out on the side of the road. One guy even got out of his car, and I had to sprint away because I was so terrified. One guy walked up to me while I was reading on the stairs outside my office building and said he’d been watching me for a while and wanted to go get coffee with me.

#45

It’s wild to me how movies and TV shows treat a woman saying 'no' like it means, 'You haven’t put enough effort in. Keep trying.'

#46

One reason many women liked wearing masks was that they could mind their own business for once in public without getting scanned for their facial expressions.

#47

Calling yourself an “alpha” or “sigma” male.

You aren’t necessarily hurting anyone by doing it, but no one takes you seriously when you talk like that.

Edit so people can stop asking: I could be wrong, but I think people who call themselves sigma consider themselves “lone wolf” types. IMO, I think they’re trying to come across as one step less douchey by not believing they exist to boss people around, but it is clearly ineffective.

Image credits: aliteralbagof_dicks

#48

Assuming that when we are on a mood we have our period

#49

Spitting on the floor in public. Why do they do it?

#50

Your friends with vaginas are *just as fully human* as your friends with d***s. They're not pets, or Playstations, or weird robot dolls you have to feed scripts to so they'll f**k you, or drop on the side of the road if they don't.

They don't derive their social status from whichever friend of yours they're dating, and they don't exist on this earth specifically to entertain your friends' girlfriends. Sometimes they don't even *like* your friends' girlfriends. On account of they are people, not some kind of...hivemind that happily drones in the background while you and your male friends do Important Man Social Things For Men Only.

#51

Thinking that being a woman is a reason for her mistakes.

I was one of the only three girls in engineering course (60 people). And if I did a mistake at class it was because I was a girl. But if my male course mate made a mistake, it is only because humans are not perfect, and next time he will do better ??

#52

Thinking they know our bodies better than us

#53

My ex-friend used to outright pretend that unattractive-to-him women didn't exist at social gatherings and whatnot. Then, he wondered why despite being 'nice' to the women he did find attractive, they didn't want to talk to him.

#54

Assuming women are on their period every time we get upset about something

#55

acting like the Big Man of the Family, the provider, while being so needy that they can't prepare a piece of toast or pot of coffee or pick out a a pair of clean underwear for themselves.

#56

Getting mad at rejection

#57

Never tell her you'll 'make her straight.' That's threatening

#58

Reacting weirdly if i say something nice

either they dismiss the compliment

or they get angry

or they think im flirting

its rare for them to say 'thanks ive been working really hard on this'

#59

If a women says she doesn’t want children, don’t respond by saying she doesn’t know better. Idk where you guys get off of telling a grown woman that she doesn’t know what she wants, but it needs to stop. If she dosent want children, respect her decision.

#60

Treating women as if they’re children.

There’s a level of protectiveness that I find attractive in a partner when it pertains to me, but what I absolutely loathe is a partner mansplaining or talking down to me due to their own superiority complex.

I’m a 28 year old female who has worked for everything she has (yes, I really am). I don’t need a partner who backs me into a corner like a kid. Challenge me, certainly. Treat me as if I don’t know any better, absolutely not.

#61

Stop assuming my emotions are irrational or illogical. Start valuing communication, empathy, and understanding in our interactions.

#62

Asking women in meetings to take notes

#63

Insulting our makeup preferences.

#64

Stop telling women who are blunt that it’s rude. Men are allowed to be blunt, why aren’t we? Seriously dudes, I’m one of those women who says what I mean and means what I say.

If I say I’m working, it means I’m working. The amount of times I get ‘oh, you’re just being mean’ is ridiculous.

#65

Acting oh so cool when there are other guys around. Especially not speaking up when they are being s****y to a woman, or making sexist jokes, just because you might be a "mood killer". Be a decent human being and tell them to stop; one of your other friends or even the majority might back you up on this and are just waiting for someone else to say something.

#66

Sexualising teenage girls

#67

Stop being misogynistic. It would solve a lot of problems.

#68

Trying to initiate chit chat while a woman is at the gym, clearly wearing earbuds, and not wanting to talk with anyone.

#69

Stop assuming I'm mad at you. If I'm quiet it's not me being mad at you. Sometimes I just need to be quiet!

#70

Stop thinking its ok to body shame and belittle women

#71

Calling anything that isn’t straight up deep fried meat and cheese “vegan food” or mocking anyone for eating their veggies. Come on, man.

#72

me being nice doesn't mean I'm interested in them, it's a concept called politeness

#73

Try to touch me with dirty hands. Go clean your talons first.

#74

Confusing “expressing your emotions” with angry violent outbursts.

#75

Thinking that what the guys in p**n do is what we want.

#76

Acting like they’re single while having a girlfriend

#77

Wash your hands after you p**s. It’s disgusting how many men don’t do this.

#78

Telling us " girls can't do anything" when we don't know how to do one thing

#79

So, I think it’s a thing only from Philly because I haven’t seen it anywhere else, but just randomly spitting on the sidewalk. It’s so nasty. One time some old man hacked a loogie on my lawn in front of my house. It was so gross.

#80

‘Alpha man’ mentality especially when the guidance tries to make the women the clear subordinate/borderline slave in some cases with SERIOUS power imbalance instead of a loving equal companionship. Basically treating women like something you can own and not seeing us as people with our own wants and needs.

#81

Acting like anger isn't an emotion and saying women are more emotional than men.

#82

Whataboutism.

Even here.

It’s not always about you.

#83


The act of insisting and not taking rejection well. It's so creepy and pushes the person away more

#84

It would be great if I could walk 2 whole blocks while wearing shorts and a tank without being approached. Stop it. I'm not looking for attention. It's just hot out.

#85

stop telling me you like me when you don’t :)

#86

Stop hitting on lesbians. We really don’t like that s**t, to put it mildly.

#87

Making laws that restrict me

#88

Bottling in emotions

#89

Stop leaving hair everywhere after shaving. My sink is a disaster zone after he trims the beard.

#90

Thinking you have some kind of power over us.
Like we have to speak to you, we have to reply to you, we have to do what you say…
No, we don’t.